ceruse

by groggy darko

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1.
guess ive swallowed more than walls can bear still i feel hallow, filled with rocks and hair call it my weakness or a blackened sens of faith call it my body or another place to store another's waste fuck im dying on a table just so i can be your quaver pus filled, crust gilled teeth coated in rust i want to chew your heart crates of offal, legs lined to the street squeamish kickback, formenting my meat id let you crawl in, just beg me sometime its more than belly, its lying like a nursery rhyme fuck im dying on a table just so i can be your quaver saturate me, arrogate me just keep company long i want to chew their hearts Killed my judge just to dream again Burnt the butter like a bloat head glutton Hell I know how to castrate a demon Hell it shows when I come back choking on the rain Filled her mouth with my greasy change Drained my blood and stored it for exchange Fuck I know how whiskey came to kill me Fuck it shows when shaking sweating kills the shame Broke my hand so you'd call a name Marrow fragments split my skin decay We fell too fast, even nightmares couldn't brace you For a past where I never tried to hate you Now I'm shut out Go away It's for you Not for me guess my stomach is splitting to let the carcass spread pelvis filling with feathers swelling legato cumming and sputtering sweat brushing eyelids gone tender ocher follows my hands something is building to push me over and over and over and over again over and over and over and over again skull shape haunted by films your perfect arms on my waist turning to kiss you feels natural but chattering ticks make up the skin on your face onyx needles make transfer paring pink pith to fiber tongue play scatters black inside the maggots inside her slide through my organs like fire the maggots inside her slide through my organs like fire guess im sad but giving it names makes it feel simpler i wasnt ready to move on if this is a winter come back and build me a home swallow try and keep it down borrowed from a livers crown kept clean like drool on a body kept green like grease on a stocking i cant get out cant get out of here shallow try and keep it thick fallow gagging jisom pitch kept whole like cracks in a levee kept creamed like pigs in a frenzy i cant get out cant get out of here im only whole when i overuse alcohol is my absolute ceruse stomach turns hammers in my head water burns cigarettes in bed i see shapes all across the walls i feel wet mauling at my pall i hear screams from the window sills i smell death smoking oxy pills getting better hurts so god damn much getting better hurts so god damn much why the hell should i be clean why the hell should i be clean
2.
tarrare 05:56
guess ive swallowed more than walls can bear still i feel hallow, filled with rocks and hair call it my weakness or a blackened sens of faith call it my body or another place to store another's waste fuck im dying on a table just so i can be your quaver pus filled, crust gilled teeth coated in rust i want to chew your heart crates of offal, legs lined to the street squeamish kickback, formenting my meat id let you crawl in, just beg me sometime its more than belly, its lying like a nursery rhyme fuck im dying on a table just so i can be your quaver saturate me, arrogate me just keep company long i want to chew their hearts
3.
go away 08:42
Killed my judge just to dream again Burnt the butter like a bloat head glutton Hell I know how to castrate a demon Hell it shows when I come back choking on the rain Filled her mouth with my greasy change Drained my blood and stored it for exchange Fuck I know how whiskey came to kill me Fuck it shows when shaking sweating kills the shame Broke my hand so you'd call a name Marrow fragments split my skin decay We fell too fast, even nightmares couldn't brace you For a past where I never tried to hate you Now I'm shut out Go away It's for you Not for me
4.
guess my stomach is splitting to let the carcass spread pelvis filling with feathers swelling legato cumming and sputtering sweat brushing eyelids gone tender ocher follows my hands something is building to push me over and over and over and over again over and over and over and over again skull shape haunted by films your perfect arms on my waist turning to kiss you feels natural but chattering ticks make up the skin on your face onyx needles make transfer paring pink pith to fiber tongue play scatters black inside the maggots inside her slide through my organs like fire the maggots inside her slide through my organs like fire guess im sad but giving it names makes it feel simpler i wasnt ready to move on if this is a winter come back and build me a home swallow try and keep it down borrowed from a livers crown kept clean like drool on a body kept green like grease on a stocking i cant get out cant get out of here shallow try and keep it thick fallow gagging jisom pitch kept whole like cracks in a levee kept creamed like pigs in a frenzy i cant get out cant get out of here im only whole when i overuse alcohol is my absolute cerruse stomach turns hammers in my head water burns cigarettes in bed i see shapes all across the walls i feel wet mauling at my pall i hear screams from the window sills i smell death smoking oxy pills getting better hurts so god damn much getting better hurts so god damn much why the hell should i be clean why the hell should i be clean

about

played live as one set
cant do it without breaking picks and strings
youll hear it
thanks
im sick

credits

released May 29, 2016

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about

groggy darko Cedar Falls, Iowa

Autoethnographic explorations of illness, addiction, sabotage, and abuse. It's hilarious.

2015-Present

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